Cheri Rodriguez

Two labors with that started so similarly and progressed so differently. The first labor began right on my due date with my water breaking. Prior to this event I had read everything I could to educate myself about labor, conveniently neglecting anything about complications. I was ready for the textbook labor - whatever that means! My favorite book had been Spiritual Midwifery and I was determined to do my best at a drug-free delivery so that my baby would be healthy and I could be in the moment. I imagined myself with a child and I loved what that image did for me. When my water broke the doctor directed me to the hospital where I was quickly processed and fitted with a hospital bracelet and labor monitor across my belly that immediately made me choke up. Already this was too medical for me. The nurse assigned to me was nice and supportive and I settled into my role of 'patient', accepted the labor inducing Pitocin and the labor pains that it brought on. Gerard stayed with me, through all of this, patient, young and excited at what was coming. As was my plan, I turned down offers for epidurals, even as the labor increased, I stayed strong until late in the labor, the doctor convinced me to accept an injection of Demerol which I think I still regret, because it really didn't help and was not what I wanted to do. I think it helped the doctor and Gerard more than it helped me. As the baby's head moved down and it was finally time to push, I remember feeling a mental switch from patient to birthing woman. Now was the part I'd been waiting for. It was hard work. No wonder they call it labor. Gerard stayed by me, rubbed my back, my arm, my forehead and my thighs which unpredictably had decided to cramp during every contraction. He did everything he could to ease the discomfort but when the doctor announced "I see the head" reality set in and I 'remembered' I was having a baby. When our baby was 1/2 out I looked up into the overhead mirror amazed at how much he looked like his father. He was already crying and so was I , so I had this feeling of being a two headed monster -both ends yelling! Finally he slid out and it was announced that he was a boy. I was thrilled - I wanted my first to be a son and now he was here. He was perfect - pink and screaming - obviously healthy, and Gerard and I were overcome with emotion - WE DID IT. As though no one else ever had. The baby being delivered right onto my stomach was an amazing and emotional event. He's 26, and I still feel the feelings that stirred in me. After I held the baby he was taken to be weighed and I was instructed to put my hands under the blankets. I remember very clearly the weird feeling of trying to put my hands on my swollen belly and it had clearly sunken in quite a bit. I was so surprised!
In retrospect and even at the time, I resented the 'medicalness' of my experience, but I didn't feel I had too many options and this did seem the safest and after all that was the bottom line. I had already been with my doctor for several years, trusted her and this was how she conducted her deliveries. I did my best to make the experience what I wanted it to be and it was an amazing experience and still is.